THE GOSPEL OF SHEALITA
by Shealita Babay
[DISCLAIMER: This article is meant to be satirical. Still, the view points reflected here are NOT REPRESENTATIVE of GaySocialites.com, Charles Winters & Associates or anyone employed or associated with CWA or any of its subsidiaries. Please send your hate mail to shealita@gaysocialites.com]
My name is Shealita Baby, and I am a devote Christian Baptist Evangelicalist! I speak the truth and virtue of the Lord King Jesus.
I would first like to thank King Ralphy, Charles Winters and all the other Faggots at GaySocialites.com for giving me the time to write this letter to talk with you and share with you the other side of the argument.
For those of you homos out there that have been too busy out there doing a mixture of cocaine, poppers, and drinking Zima’s at the local disco, there’s a Same Sex Marriage fiasco going on in this country.
I, for one, am totally against this notion of a man having the right to marry another man, and visa versa. It is this kind of thinking that is destroying this fine Christian Nation we call The United States of America were Jesus Christ resides.
If you give the homosexuals the right to marry; what next?! The only thing to come out of gay marriage is that the ability to marry your dog, or cat, or maybe even horse with his 15 inches of Clydesdale glory will be legal! Then it will be that the damn pedophiles want their rights to sniff bike seats and cruise playgrounds. This kind of thinking has got to stop!
We do not need this sort of embarrassing gay fag marriage debockle going on in our great country. Last time we decided to change things up a bit, the white man lost his right to the front seat of the bus and was forced to share a bathroom with a person of color!
This is was ridiculous cause everyone knows that the colored mans bowel movements destroy the toilet bowl, all them collard greens and fried chicken skins are deadly enough to rupture the septic tank.
We need to get America back on track and in the White Direction! Hallelujah! Go in the name of Christ and spread his love..but just not that nasty faggot buttcheek poundin kind of love.
With Love and Compassion,
Shealita Baby, Lady of the Lord
[DISCLAIMER: I REPEAT! This article is meant to be satirical. Still, the view points reflected here are NOT REPRESENTATIVE of GaySocialites.com, Charles Winters & Associates or anyone employed or associated with CWA or any of its subsidiaries. Please send your hate mail to shealita@gaysocialites.com]